Growing into Love

“When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known. So now faith, hope and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.” I Corinthians 13:11-13 (ESV)

Childhood is an important nurturing time. We hear much about aberrations in behavior in school children, in social situations, in the work place, in family life and even in our churches that can be traced to some childhood trauma, mistreatment or abuse. Unless we can put away childish thoughts and behavior and act as responsible adults, we are likely to be maladjusted. Much time and energy are spent on trying to right wrongs experienced in a formative period of life. How fortunate the child with loving, Christian parents to emulate, who can grow in an environment of peace and concern. It even takes what we call “tough love” to accomplish this atmosphere, together with much dependence upon the Lord.

The Christian seeks to grow in maturity. It was said of Jesus that “He increased in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man.” (Luke 2:52). As a man, a mature individual, the Christian “puts away childish things.” He grows in agape
love.

Here as we struggle and evaluate our progress in the Christian life, it is sometimes like looking into a poorly made mirror such as the ones used in the days of Paul the Apostle. The reflection seen is distorted at best, dim. But when the Christian looks face-to-face upon the example Christ left for each to follow, we see a way made manifest, not as in an oblique or poorly-silvered mirror. The Bible is our guide for these Christ-like characteristics. It is a big order to emulate, to grow in the kind of love Christ always demonstrated. We begin this sanctification journey here in this life. It will be completed with glorification in the life to come when “we shall know, even as also we are known.” In the meantime, we are to seek to grow more Christlike in behavior and action.

We continue to need all three, faith, hope and love, as we pursue the Christian journey on earth. Faith is our trusting commitment to God. Hope is trustful expectation of the fulfillment of God’s promises. Love, agape love, is unselfish, loyal and benevolent concern for the well-being of others as well as our love for God. “Faith, hope and love abide, but the greatest of these is love.”

c Ethelene Dyer Jones; Friday, February 19, 2010

Above All Else, Love Never Ends

“Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away.”—I Corinthians 13:8-10 (ESV)

Living and dwelling now in the finite dimension, it is hard for me to fully comprehend infinity and the aspect of time-without-end, and love-without end.

Here we have God’s abiding Word that Love will never end. We will love and be loved in the infinite, spiritual dimension when we enter our heavenly home. Of the emotions and characteristics we share in the earthly dimension, love will be one we will continue in Heaven. Only there, we will truly know what love is and how to share it in perfect synchronization with God’s will and way for us.

Some of the spiritual entities we will not need in Heaven will not exist there. Prophecy will pass away, because all prophecies will have been fulfilled. Tongues will cease (Paul could have meant this in the sense of ecstatic utterances ‘under the Spirit’ or speaking in languages other than our native tongue). We won’t need tongues because we will know and understand a common language, and it will be full of love and rejoicing. Knowledge, which we seem to be forever pursuing here, will pass away, for then “we shall know, even as also we are known” (I Cor. 13:12b). Can you imagine the delight of knowing, as well as understanding, all one needs and wants to know? No struggling to “figure something out.” All the puzzles will be solved.

Here it is possible for us to know, to prophecy, and to love only partially, imperfectly at best. But when Perfect Love (Jesus Christ, the Returning King) comes to receive the faithful unto Himself, all that has been partial and a foretaste will be made perfect and everlasting.

Prayer: Father, thank You for loving me, unworthy though I am to receive Your love. Thank you for earthly love and for the opportunity to love You, and to share Your love with others. May I practice unconditional love to others so that what is begun here may continue into eternity. Amen.

c Ethelene Dyer Jones; Thursday, February 18, 2010

Characteristics of Love (Part 3)

“It does not rejoice in wrong doing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” –I Corinthians 13:6-7 [ESV]

“Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” –I Corinthians 13:6-7 [NIV]

In seeking the depth of truth in these verses and trying to understand God’s message concerning how I should exercise godly love in my life, I gathered about me the various translations of the Bible I have and read each prayerfully. One phrase presents a “problem” to interpret. That is the phrase, in the KJV, the NKJV, the ESV (and perhaps others): “Love…believes all things.”

Immediately an argument arises: How can I ‘believe all things’ in love? Certainly there are untruths, false doctrines, rampant rumors and ideologies I have no business believing. Where does discernment come in? What could God through Paul have meant by saying that “love believes all things”? This morning I wish I had moved to this house our Greek-English interlinear New Testament. Then I could have refreshed my small understanding of the Greek language as I pondered this “problem” phrase. But I think I found my answer in the NIV translation: Instead of “believes all things” the phrase is rendered “always trusts.” Indeed, the one who loves always trusts the beloved. Trust is a necessary basis for love.

For you who may have The Message (The Bible in Contemporary Language) by Eugene H. Peterson, you will enjoy the way he arranges verses 4-7 as a “set-apart” list of attributes and actions of love. For this problem phrase--“believes all things”—he writes it as “Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth.” If we seek God’s will in love we will know truth, and know what to believe, for Jesus said, “I am…Truth.” Add to truth trust and love can grow.

And now we move to “love lived in real life,” or “love in action.” And I illustrate with two of my own life experiences, brought firmly to mind because today is a special day in the Jones family, February 17.

I write this on February 17, an anniversary on two counts. My second grandson and fourth grandchild, Nathan Jones, was born February 17, 1980. It’s hard to believe that he is already 30 years old. Time has a way of passing rapidly as you see a winsome boy grow into a responsible adult. Reared by Christian parents in a Christian home and brought up in nurturing churches, Nathan has been “on his own” for several years. Now he works in a job he loves as a school band director in Karnes City, Texas. He and his wife Kayla also are active in their church where they lead the youth and he is part-time minister of music. They have little Brenna, 3 ½, whom they are training up in a Christian home and teaching the characteristics of love-in-action as outlined by Paul. When one grows old (as I am), experiencing a Christian legacy active to the third and fourth generation down from yourself gives pause for gratitude and rejoicing. Love hopes. Love endures.

February 17th’s second anniversary of significance to this Jones family means that this is the date when Grover and I moved from Epworth to Milledgeville in 2003, taking up a new residence and a new way of life here after thinking we were “settled” in the mountains until the Lord calls us home. But love and how to deal with circumstances cause us to make necessary changes and adjustments in life. After much prayer and listing the positives and negatives of such a major move, I purchased the house next door to our daughter Cynthia in June, 2002. (Grover was then already into the grip of Alzheimer’s and unable to make major decisions, so I had to do this transaction on my own). Weighing the situation, I went with the characteristic of love which The Message lists as “Trusts God always.”

Christians have accepted us here as their brothers and sisters in Christ. Love has been shown in deed and in fellowship. Has it been easy to make the transition? No. But the assurance that God directed the move has been paramount. We’ve missed close proximity with the hills of home and friends and relatives there we held so dear. Painful decisions have been necessary, as, three years ago (February 22, 2007) Grover had to enter a nursing home facility. Since then, we both have endured and survived serious illnesses and surgeries. Through it all, God’s love and the love of fellow Christians and family have sustained us. Love endures. As The Message states it, “Love keeps going (and I should add keeps growing) to the end.”

Prayer: Father, thank You for insights into Your unconditional love. From it we learn how to love one another, for God is love. May our love keep going until the end and beyond. Amen.

c Ethelene Dyer Jones; Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Characteristics of Love (Part 2)

“[Love] does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth.” –I Corinthians 13:5. [NKJV]

A person with God’s love in his heart is polite, kind and considerate—never rude in behavior. We live in a “dog-eat-dog age,” in an era of road rage and manners-not-minded conduct. Rough-hewn personalities emerge when least expected unless we allow the love of God and the Spirit of God to control our actions toward others. Graciousness and courtesy can be taught, can be learned. Love exemplifies this characteristic.

Love does not seek its own. This does not mean that we should abandon our children or those in need of our help and leave them to scrap out a life for themselves. It does mean that we abandon our own selfish interests and pursuits, not amassing to ourselves those things which we do not need and seldom use.

Love does not insist upon its own way but seeks the mutual good and well-being of those involved in the love relationship. Love is completely unselfish, seeking for the other better than for self.

Love is not provoked. From the Latin “pro” and “vocare,” it literally means to call forth with the voice. To incite to anger, to stir up consciously, to pique or quicken.

Love never seeks to vex, rile, aggravate or offend. Instead of provoking, the one with love in his heart seeks to calm, propitiate, soothe, and quell.

Love thinks no evil. We’re familiar with the hands over eyes, ears, mouth and the admonition to “See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil.” But just let a ripe piece of gossip fall upon our ears. Not only do we think about it and harbor ill-will against the person or persons whom the gossip targets. Further, we can hardly wait to tell someone else, “Did you hear…?” And the rumors run rife. Love thinks no evil of others. Check the sources and the stories. Think no evil, harmful or character-demeaning thoughts of others. This is easier said than practiced. Work on it.

Love rejoices—not in iniquity but in truth. This is akin to thinking no evil about others. We do not rejoice in unrighteousness. Love rejoices in the truth. How much more quickly do we hear bad news instead of good news, evil news rather than beneficial news? Could our love for others allow us to begin rejoicing in the good, the true?

Prayer: Father, help me to replace negative characteristics with positive ones in my life.

c Ethelene Dyer Jones; Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Characteristics of Love (Part 1)

“Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up”—I Corinthians 13:4 (KJV)
“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant –I Cor. 13:4 (ESV)

I deliberately printed both the KJV and the ESV of this familiar verse from Paul’s great love chapter. We’ve long since come to learn that the word charity in Old English is more accurately rendered love in our language. “It’s love, it’s love, it’s love that makes the world go ‘round,” a popular song declares. Perhaps there is no word in our or in any language about which so much has been written as love.

What characteristics of love does God want me to learn and put into practice? Love “suffers long,” or is “patient.” Remember when your toddler started to walk? The baby would stumble, fall, and sometimes not try the new adventure for days. But a patient parent helps the child, holds his hands, encourages him to try again. What if God had not been patient—persistent and steadfast—with us? Likewise, if we have true love in our hearts we will be patient with all whom we love and should love.

Love is kind. I had a wonderful elderly neighbor lady when I was fourteen, the year my mother died (on Valentine’s Day). Her name was Mrs. Vallie Jones. She lived next door to us with Mrs. Duckworth and helped that family with housework. Likewise, when she realized I was suddenly thrust into the position of being “lady of my house” at an early age, she took time to patiently and kindly teach me how to cook, how to manage, how to clean thoroughly, sew, and yet keep my insatiable desire to attend school despite my work load at home. When I think of kindness, this characteristic of love is personified for me in Mrs. Vallie Jones. She was my mother’s first cousin, and wanted her cousin’s daughter to learn the aspects of kindness. I think kindness is represented well by its synonym, “good-hearted”.

Love does not envy. That is, regardless of what others about you may have, love does not covet their goods or position, nor begrudge anything they have. Is this hard to do? Yes. But love has no vestiges of rivalry, greed or covetousness.

Love does not vaunt itself or boast. “He that tooteth his own horn, it is not tooted,” we often hear. Does that make it right for us to vaunt or brag, be vain or egotistical? Certainly not. This is a hard characteristic of love to practice. To be truthful, we all like to talk somewhat of where we were and what we have become. But the Lord says, “Love does not boast!” Paul certainly stated it wisely in Galatians 6:14: “But far be it from me to boast except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, by which the world has been crucified to me and I to the world.” (ESV)

Love is not puffed up or arrogant. Few of us like to see arrogant, haughty, overbearing, proud or conceited people. To be “better than thou” or uppish and snobbish are certainly traits that have no comeliness about them. Love, because it should be unconditional and pure, God-motivated and wholesome, has no place whatsoever for arrogance or pride.

Prayer: Today may I examine my motivations for love and the characteristics of the love I hold for You and for my family, friends, associates. May God-like love be exemplified in my life. Amen.

c Ethelene Dyer Jones; Monday, February 15, 2010

Sacrifice without Love Is Nothing

“And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing.” –I Corinthians 13:3

We hear much now, especially during this period of economic distress, of how many are poverty-stricken in the world. Numerous organizations are dedicated to feeding the hungry. In my mailbox come frequent letters soliciting funds for food distribution. Soup kitchens and food pantries also seek to relieve some of the hunger that plagues our society. If I have any compassion at all, I will not want anyone to go hungry. Yet at the same time, how can I respond to so many requests for money for food? I have an obligation to check the authenticity of requests. I will seek to respond to those that are honest and put the money sent into actual food for the hungry. Paul said that if we give “all our goods to feed the poor … but have not love, it profits me nothing.” Genuine love for the hungry should always precede my giving to relieve it. I should think of myself as being the one hungry. How would I feel if my sustenance came from those who merely felt some need to make a token contribution for food without any compassion, mercy and love?

In the days of the early church, many people met death for their faith. In Fox’s Book of Martyrs we read accounts of stalwart Christians who counted it a privilege to be burned at the stake or cast to lions rather than recant their faith. Even today, we hear of those in some countries who meet death because of their faith. But Paul warned us that to meet a martyr’s death, and have not love, “it profits me nothing.” Sometimes we pour out our lives in causes, giving our lives in sacrifice to callings that have no connection to God’s claim on our lives. This could be a consuming interest for a job, an ambition outside the parameters of God’s calling, or even pleasures that are more important than our devotion and commitment to God. We can “burn up” and “burn out” for good causes without giving God preeminence. Where am I on “giving my body to be burned?”

Prayer: God, teach me to love You supremely and others as myself. Amen.

[Correction: In yesterday’s devotional, “Expressing Love through Music,” the date when Dr. Paul McCommon organized the Sons of Jubal men’s chorus should have read 1954. Thanks, Rev. John Cotton, for seeing and correcting my typo!]

c Ethelene Dyer Jones; Saturday, February 13, 2010

The Primacy of Love

“If I have the gift of prophecy, and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.” I Cor. 13:2 (NIV)

In stating the primacy of love in that great “Love Chapter”—I Corinthians 13—Paul the Apostle, moved by the Spirit to write, taught us much about love and the superior place it should hold in the Christian’s life.

Prophecy was very important in the Old Testament and even in the New Testament times. Consider how many great books in the Bible we have written by prophets. We even divide them into “major” and “minor” to learn to say the books of the Bible. But know that none of the prophetic books are “minor”—as relates to unimportance. All are God’s Word. Some are just shorter than others. Maybe that’s why some Bible teacher long ago termed them “minor.” But even if I could prophecy—forthtell the future, or, in another definition for prophet, tell God’s Word to the people, if I could do that and not have love in my heart for God and for people, my prophesying (witnessing, forth-telling) would be absolutely vain.

And if I had enough faith to say, “Big mountain, move!” and was not motivated by love, that great faith would mean nothing. Mountain here, as I interpret it, means anything major—a challenge, a problem, a trial—in life. Faith in God helps us overcome even the most difficult of problems (or mountains) in our lives. We need such faith; we need to grow in faith. But what good is removing the mountain, if, at the same time, we cannot have genuine love in our hearts for God and for others? Love must precede the faith to move mountains in our lives. Love is first.

“If I have not love, I am nothing!” We’re talking about unconditional love here. Not love that is selfish, self-aggrandizing, self-seeking. Love seeks the best for others. Love for God allows Him into the believer’s life so that human love can aspire to be like the love of God for us. What an order! We must constantly work on loving as God wants to teach us how to love. And our example is Jesus! Paul concluded: “Faith, hope, love; but the greatest of these is love” (13:13).

c Ethelene Dyer Jones; Thursday, February 11, 2010

Love Is Strong

“He brought me to the banqueting house, and his banner over me was love.
Many waters cannot quench love; neither can the floods drown it. –Song of Solomon 2:4; Song of Solomon 8:7

Controversies often arise over the meaning, symbolism and interpretation of the Song of Solomon.

On the one hand, some scholars hold that it is a love song lauding the physical beauty and delights of love in marriage. On the other hand, many hold that the book is symbolic of Christ’s love for His church, His bride, and of the church’s (the bride’s) appreciation for and return of His love.

Picture the bride, the church, escorted to a well-appointed banquet hall, elaborately decorated, and with a repast awaiting on the tables that is comparable to none seen before. “His banner over me is love.” Lavish provision has been made for the bride. But even greater than the feast and the luxurious place for the banquet is the motivation proclaimed on the banner. Love is the reason for the celebration.

Then change scenes. The rains come, floods occur, the waters rise. But no amount of water can quench or drown love. It remains steadfast though buffeted and tossed by heavy floods.

Love is strong. It endures when all else fails. It is the greatest of the three spiritual characteristics Paul the Apostle writes about in I Corinthians 13. “Love never fails.” (v. 8) “And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love.” (v. 13).

Whichever interpretation of Song of Solomon we hold, we can learn great truths about love from its pages. Whether in human love or love of the church for Christ the Lord, it should be strong, steadfast and sincere. Love is strong.

[A note: This little devotional was written early this morning, but due to a deep love situation in my life, I am not getting it sent until almost midnight. From 9:00 a. m. until 8:30 p. m., I have been at my beloved husband’s bedside. He has been quite ill this week (as well as for a long time). The love we have built over the 60+ years we have been husband and wife has been strong and steadfast—and is still strong, despite circumstances of long-term and critical illness. Right now I’m in the midst of the flood of near separation, but love is not quenched. Love is strong!]

c Ethelene Dyer Jones; Sunday, February 7, 2010

A Time to Love

“A time to love, and a time to hate…” -Ecclesiastes 3:8a

“A time to love.” What Old Testament writer wrote these words, and who was the “Preacher” (KJV), rendered “Teacher” (NIV and later versions), “son of David” referred to as the author in Ecclesiastes 1:1? Much ink has been spilled over whether the author was King Solomon (son of David) or some other, later “preacher” or “teacher” of Israel. Of importance is that we know the message of this book in the Old Testament is from God Himself, regardless of who might have been the human instrument to pen the words. And he taught us that there is “a time to love.” (We’ll focus on love here; not hate, although, according to the Teacher/Preacher, there is a time for both in human affairs.)

A wise teacher of the Bible once taught me something that has remained with me for many years: “Nearly always, you can find in the Bible itself an interpretation of verses, principles or questions that trouble you. Just keep reading and searching prayerfully, and God, in His Word, will reveal the truth to you.” For interpreting “a time to love,” consider these:

The Teacher/Preacher stated in Ecclesiastes 2:26a: “For God gives wisdom and knowledge and joy to a man who is good in His sight.” In Ecclesiastes 3:1: “To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven.” And in a catalogue of “times” that transpire in human experience, we learn: “A time to be born, a time to plant, a time to kill, a time to weep, a time to cast away stones, a time to get, a time to rend, a time to love…” and there are more seasons. With each of these actions, the usual Hebrew poetic device of parallelism—or positioning one action against a contrasting action—is used. This helps us to see and understand more clearly “a time to love…”

In the heart of God, love was born.
In the heart of humankind, made in the image of God, is the capacity for love.

Therefore, the God of love ordained that we, His creation most like Him, have the capacity to love. Love is lofty, a sublime emotion. Love is an offering, poured out in submission and joy. Love is vital, life-giving, sustaining.

Love is eternal, transcendent. “And now abide faith, hope, love, these three, but the greatest of these is love.” (I Corinthians 13:13.) The time to love is now!

c Ethelene Dyer Jones; Saturday, February 6, 2010

Speak in Love

“Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not love, I am become as sounding brass or a tinkling cymbal.” --I Corinthians 13:1

Through discernment, we can easily recognize insincerity in speech.
I can be as a mighty orator, speaking forth high-minded thoughts,
but if I do not speak with sincerity and love, my words are vain.

I can speak angelic thoughts, as if what I say is a message from Heaven,
but if I lack love and purpose, my wards are empty.

Words can be well-chosen, clear as a gong against well-crafted brass.
Words can resound with majestic ringing as clear notes from a cymbal,
but without love, such words bear no worthy message.

Dr. Dick Furman, an American surgeon, was returning by plane January 25, 2010 from a mission assignment to earthquake devastated Haiti. There he had spent weeks in heartbreaking and grueling surgical work, trying to patch up mangled bodies caught under rubble from falling buildings. On the plane, tired in body and troubled in spirit over the plight of the people he left, Dr. Furman wrote impressions of his work and the people he had sought to relieve from terrible suffering. He made hospital rounds the night before he left, and at each bedside he stopped to caress the brows of people. He had amputated limbs of several, performed tedious wound surgery, done the best he could under circumstances to relieve their suffering. He bowed his head, filled with love and compassion, and prayed for the people who had lost so much and still were suffering unbelievably. Holding each patient’s hand individually, he voiced as his prayer Philippians 4:7: “May the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” He spoke in love and with deep compassion. He had done what he could with the surgeon’s knife. Now they needed Jesus, the Great Physician. Maybe other Christian voices, speaking in love after Dr. Furman left Haiti, would continue to minister to their spiritual needs.

With love and compassion in your heart, pray to God now on behalf of the Haitian people who are in such great need, physically and spiritually. Speak in love.

c Ethelene Dyer Jones; Monday, February 1, 2010